[And now, once again, it's time for some relationship advice from the last person in the world who ought to be dispensing relationship advice.]
Things not to say to your significant other*:
- I'm sorry. I wanted so much more, but instead I settled for you.
- I've never, not once, found you attractive.
- Your voice grates on my nerves.
- I'm only with you because I felt sorry for you.
- What do I see in her? Well, for starters, she's pretty.
- Go ahead, do it, and I'll break your fucking head open.
*Unless you want the relationship to end right then.
I've been guilty of spewing a few of these before... the last one is dead-on AnoMALIE-style.
ReplyDelete[Anger management? What the hell is that?]
These rules should have been shared with me wayyy sooner.
wait...is this published somewhere? Why was I not told that there was a fucking manual???
ReplyDeletenumber three will be true at some time. so will number five. sweet.
ReplyDeletenoted.....you, as I have said before, are a class act. heh
ReplyDeleteThanks for the tips I am doing good right now in ending relationships all by myself though
ReplyDelete#1 is spectacularly BAD to say if you:
ReplyDeleteA. Just had sex
B. Proposed marriage a few hours earlier (hence, the sex)
Not that I personally have ever heard ANY of these words uttered ....
*cough, wheeze, choke*
I disagree-- it's super hot when my boyfriend* says "Go ahead, do it, and I'll break your fucking head open."
ReplyDelete*fine, fine, my IMAGINARY boyfriend, Christian Bale.
I've said half, had half said to me. I with none of those people.
ReplyDeleteI've said AT LEAST one of those before.
ReplyDelete