I have a friend who shares my exact taste in movies and music. Nary a conversation between the two of us ends without at least some discussion of a new CD to pick up, or a movie that the other should go see (if they haven't already). And yes, I said nary.
The last time I talked to him I asked if he had seen Eragon yet. Of course, nobody should have seen Eragon yet, unless it was to make fun of (or beat up) fantasy nerds, but I digress. (Speaking of digressing, I urge you all to click here and read Eric D. Snider's review of the movie, if only for the opening sentence. Go on, I'll wait). Not surprisingly, he hadn't seen it. After all, he likes the same movies I do, and I only like good movies. Plus, he's not really into beating up fantasy nerds (he will make fun of them though - like you wouldn't believe). However, he pointed out that a guy we did our master's degrees with probably had.
Now, I'm not really one to make fun of people. Ok, that's a lie. But few have made it easier to do than this guy did. He was comic book guy, minus the goatee and ponytail. This guy was nearly 30 (if not already-I forget), and spent his adult life living alone and strengthening his D&D character (he even had a nice fantasy sounding name which I'd give to you, but I googled it last night and apparently he's still going strong).
When the first installment of The Lord of the Rings came out in theaters I asked him if he was going to dress up like Gandalf and camp for tickets.
His response? "I couldn't go as Gandalf, I don't have the outfit. I could go as Strider though."
He was serious. He even owned a sword.
Curiously, he never learned the lesson of always logging yourself out of things when using a shared computer. One time I offended his girlfriend by pretending to be him when he left his IM account open, but the best thing was when he left his email account open on one of the lab computers.
He may as well have put a bow and a tag that read 'To: Native Minnow, enjoy.'
It was springtime, the semester was about to end, and students would be getting a little break before the summer terms began. Since all this guy could talk about was playing these fantasy games, and how strong his alter-ego was, I decided to go through his contacts list and send an email to a few other grad students inviting them to join the next game. With the help of two of my friends, I composed four emails and sent them out. I only remember one of them well enough to reproduce it here, but it's enough to get the point across. It went something like this:
[Fellow Grad Student],
Some of my friends and I are going to be starting a new game later this Spring and are looking for a few new players to join us. Specifically, we were wondering if you would be interested in playing a left handed axe wielding dwarf. Let me know, it should be a lot of fun.
[Comic Book Guy's look-alike]
Each email had a different character that was very much 'Lord of the Rings' themed. They were something like an evil sorcerer, an arrow shooting good elf with magic powers, and a mercenary swordsman on horseback.
I figured that each of the four recipients would realize what had happened and know it was a joke. Imagine what he thought when two of them politely declined in an actual response.
4 comments:
You'd better be careful, you wouldn't want him to release Na-Kruthik, the Mantis Hound on you would you? I think I'm one of the ones you sent that out to, but none of those characters sound familiar.
I'm not too concerned. If he does that, I'll just have Har Nemin bind those demons with the Staff of Storms.
You were one of the ones who got the email, but I can't remember which character you were supposed to be. It wasn't the left handed axe wielding dwarf. That one was meant for a certain stocky entomologist.
Have you seen the Reno 911 episodes where the police are called to arrest the Dungeons and Dragons Master? It is hilarious...Psychointern/Dr.
I'm working on a new character. He is a dark half-elf with magic summoning abilities and +3 health regeneration per roll after any blunt strike. His name is Sorimor and he is a chaotic evil dual-handed mace fighter with +5 to hit for stealth attacks. He comes from the forests of Girblath whose inhabitants have suffered famine and destruction at the hands of the pale god Horizutah. The deaths of his elven family members and friends prompted him to declare war against Horizutah and his white-wizard armies. If Sorimor encounters a white-wizard, he gains first-strike advantage and magic resistance. Sorimor is goal-oriented, muscular, and looks good in tights.
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