It's the same in any language

I'm not entirely sure why, but today I feel a pressing need to tell you a childish joke instead of giving you anything original. Deal with it.

There was a shipwreck in the South Pacific, and three survivors (all men) washed ashore on the same island. Initially, they thought the island was deserted, but after exploring for a day or two they encountered some natives and were captured by a handful of warriors from the tribe. The warriors tied the men up, took them back to the village, and placed them between a large bonfire and the hut of The Chief.

The Chief sent one of his advisors to speak to the captives as the rest of the natives gathered around. The advisor approached the first of the captives and said, "The Chief wants to know which you choose: Death or Unga-Bunga?"

Eyeing a large cauldron atop the bonfire, and suspecting that the natives were cannibalistic, the man replied, "I don't want to die. I choose Unga-Bunga."

The advisor went back to the Chief, and relayed the first man's choice to him. The Chief bellowed to the crowd, "He chooses, Unga-Bunga!!!"

Cheers erupted from the natives who had gathered. Then they began chanting, "Unga-Bunga, Unga-Bunga" over and over again. After a few minutes, the crowd parted, and a large warrior emerged. The warrior walked over to the first man, cut the ropes that were binding him to the pole he was tied to, and anally raped him in front of the Chief and the other natives, all whilst the natives continued chanting "Unga-Bunga."

When the warrior had finished, the Chief told the man he was free to go, and he hobbled off into the jungle.

Then, the Chief's advisor went up to the second man and gave him the same choice. "Well," the man said, "Unga-Bunga doesn't look like a whole lot of fun, but I really don't want to die. I want to be able to see my family again, so I choose Unga-Bunga as well."

The advisor relayed the message to the Chief, and the Chief again bellowed, ""He chooses, Unga-Bunga!!!"

Again, cheers erupted from the crowd, followed by chanting. Again, a large warrior emerged, cut down the captive and proceeded to anally rape him. When the warrior finished, the man was told he could leave, and he too hobbled off into the jungle.

Then the advisor approached the third captive. "Do you choose death, or Unga-Bunga?"

"I'm a very religious man, a devout Christian who believes that homosexuality is a sin. If I choose Unga-Bunga, I will be judged as a sinner by The Lord, and will spend eternity in Hell. While I would like to see my loved ones again before I die, I believe that I will be rewarded in the afterlife with a place in Heaven because of my decision. Therefore, I choose death."

The advisor returned to the Chief and said, "He chooses death."

The Chief then turned to the crowd and yelled, "Our prisoner has chosen, and we will honor his wishes. I sentence him to death, by Unga-Bunga!!!"