Wednesday, May 21, 2008

Do you wanna sleep with common people like me?

Not to dwell too much on this past weekend, but as we were handing out free ice cream to anyone with a backstage pass, we'd often get people trying to pay us even though they didn't need to. Since that goes against everything The Ice Cream Man is about, we had to tell them we couldn't accept tips or donations*. In one instance, I was standing away from the van throwing some stuff in a nearby garbage can when a fat hippie girl came up to get some ice cream.

Fat Hippie Girl: How much is it for an ice cream bar?
Crew Member 1: Put your wallet away. It's free.
Crew Member 2 (jokingly): Well, it's not exactly free. You just have to put out first.
Fat Hippie Girl: That's fine. I don't mind kissing someone for a free ice cream bar.
Crew Member 1 (pointing at me): Go see that guy.
Fat Hippie Girl: No, that's ok.

Spurned by a fat hippie girl**. Can I sink any lower?






*However, the ban on tips and donations didn't stop us from taking items in trade. I got a cool stone carving from one guy, another guy brought us a bag of fresh cherries to snack on, and some of the ice cream crew were able to use their status to obtain free pizza from one of the vendors.

**Did I mention that she was ugly too?

7 comments:

adventures of a mad scientist said...

Well if she was ugly, then there's no loss there, right? You're the pickiest man on earth; I'm sure you won't lose sleep over it. :P

Native Minnow said...

Elbee, it's the principle of the matter. If she was fat and ugly, she should have been more than happy to put out to someone like me. Then I could have been the rejector, and all would be right in the world.

h said...

Hippies don't know when they're ugly, fat, smelly etc... It's incumbent on us to tell them.

P.S. "I wish hippies had a single throat so I could cut it" is paraphrasing Emperor Caligula. I replaced "humanity" with "hippies".

Anonymous said...

guess even fat ugly hippie girls have standards =)

steph said...

i love this whole story and all of your pictures! how awesome is all of this?! although i am not a fan of The Hippies at all, it sounds like it would be very awesome. love it!

AnoMALIE said...

Ahahaha! Oh man... that's jacked!

But I totally agree with elbee.

Now excuse me... I have to laugh some more... (but not AT you...)

Mr. DNA said...

Umm, okay, check check, check one,
Here goes...

Because she was gay?

TA DA!