Is he alive or is he dead? Has he thoughts within his head? We'll just pass him there. Why should we even care?

This week's seminar speaker was a guy who was involved with the sequencing of Ozzy Osbourne's genome. I wrote down some quotes from his talk (the only notes I took, and only because they were hilarious).

Ozzy's motivation for participating in the study? "Given the swimming pools of booze I've guzzled over the years, not to mention all of the cocaine, morphine, sleeping pills . . . you name it, there's really no plausible medical reason why I should be alive. Maybe my DNA could say why."

When they analyzed his genome, they found some unique gene variants, one of which was a protein that alters the way his body processes alcohol. Ozzy's response? "I used to drink four bottles of cognac a day. I'm not sure I need a Harvard scientist to get to the bottom of that mystery."

Ozzy possesses a gene that makes him more resistant to heroin addiction. His take on that? "I was never addicted to street heroin, 'cause it made me throw up. A terrible waste of booze."

Ozzy's genes make him slightly more likely to develop an addiction to cocaine. Apparently he didn't buy that: "This must be bollocks, because anyone who takes coke as much as I did gets hooked."

The presence of other alleles that they found mean that Ozzy is more likely to hallucinate while on marijuana. He did believe that one: "Makes sense, although I was usually loaded on so many different things at the same time, it was hard to know what was doing what."

He also has one region of his genome that contains DNA sequences from Neanderthals. Apparently it's very common for Europeans to carry Neanderthal DNA sequences. Pretty cool stuff in my opinion.

Kind of makes me want to go get my genome scanned so I can find out what unique traits I'm carrying. I doubt mine would generate as many headlines as this one does though.

You're a rocket queen oh yeah, I might be too much but honey you're a bit obscene

I went to a Halloween party on Saturday, and dressed up as Axl Rose. I took the wig, bandana and hat off as soon as I got in my car to leave, and left them there when I got home.

Sunday I took my kids for a drive out to Hoover Dam. As we came back into town we stopped to get some dinner. The kids thought it'd be funny to each take one item and wear it into the restaurant: Tortellini donned the wig, Togers put on the hat, and Mr M was left with the bandana, but he didn't want to wear it.

"No, [Togers]. I wanna wear the gay cop hat."

They all traded items so that Tortellini wore the bandana, Togers wore the wig, and Mr M wore the "gay cop hat". Everybody seemed happy with the new arrangement. It might be time to start worrying about the boys.