Can't Sleep

I just want to go on the record as saying that I can't freakin' stand insomnia. This will be the second night in a row that I haven't been able to sleep. I think that having a cold is definitely playing a role, but I'm more stressed out about my ex's mom than anything else. I'm going to visit her later on today, but I don't know what to say or do. They are having a family Christmas party and she told my ex to invite me to it. It could be wierd, but I think I need to show my support to her family (and more importantly, my kids) at this time. I don't know what I'm going to say to her. I'll probably just have to let her know how sorry I am that all this is happening and leave it at that. I hate being powerless to do anything that could possibly help. I've never really been good at saying goodbye, and that's even when it isn't going to be permanent.

I think that times like this it's good that I have a religious upbringing though. I operate under the assumption that there is an afterlife, and that she's going to a better place. She's a good woman, and has definitely tried to live her life the right way. I believe that her family will have the opportunity to be together again, which I'm hoping will bring them all some level of comfort. I know they all could use some of that right now.