More at Peace

I went to my ex-wife's family Christmas party yesterday. It was kind of crazy. There are ten kids in her family, and all but one of them is married with kids of their own. Needless to say, there were a lot of people around the house. It was a little wierd when I first walked in since I haven't seen many of these people since my ex and I split up, but I think they were happy to see me.

Their mom was resting when I first arrived so I spent the first hour catching up with everyone. It made me realize how out of touch my ex is with her family, because most of them had no idea that I was living in Vegas (3 1/2 years now), or working on a Ph D. One of them thought that I already was remarried and another thought I was about to get remarried (hell no). Somebody else acted surprised when I told them I had completed my masters degree (even though I only had a semester left when we split up). In their defense, it's entirely possible that they had been told all that information at some point and just forgotten because it's been so long.

I was a little bit surprised when their mom felt rested enough to visit with people because she sent someone downstairs and told them that she wanted to talk to me first. I went up and sat on her bed, gave her a hug and told her I was sorry to hear about her condition. She just smiled and told me that it would be ok. She asked me about what I was up to (school and teaching labs), how close I was to finishing my degree (hopefully 2 yrs), whether or not I was getting married (I really don't know where that one came from - someone must have been making some assumptions, of course I guess I can understand that if they all thought I was still involved with my old girlfriend), etc.

She also asked me what I thought about my ex's new boyfriend. I told her that I liked him a lot. He seems to be really good with the kids, and they seem to think very highly of him. My ex seems to be happy now, and he's not a loser like most of the other guys she's dated since we split up. I told her I was happy that my ex had found someone who seemed to be able to get along with her, but that I'm positive that I would still be better in the sack (ok, so I made that last part up - just seeing if you're still paying attention). I spent about 15 minutes talking to her, but didn't want to take up all her time as all her kids and grandkids were wanting to spend some time with her too. She told me that she loved me, and that she was really happy that my ex and I had been able to put all the bad stuff behind us and remain friends because that makes it easier for the kids. All in all it was a good chat, and she seems to be very at peace with what is going on.

She's very brave, and may have just been putting on a good face in order to make it easier on her family. If that's the case, it must be working because she managed to make me feel a lot better about it than I did before. Hopefully she'll make her family feel the same way.