Don't get sentimental, it always ends up drivel

Somebody stop me, over the past week I've been getting nostalgiac for the days when I was first married and starting college. I think it has to do mostly with the fact that I've been a lot of different places where music from that time period has been playing. It's funny how nostalgia works. You only end up remembering the good things, and often forget about how completely miserable you really were at the time.

Another reason for this wave of nostalgia could be the fact that my ex-wife is getting remarried soon. I'm not jealous or anything, it just puts another stamp of finality on the situation. They're tying the knot in Mexico, so I won't be going, but my kids will. I've been talking to her a lot on the phone because I have to write a note, signed and notorized, that grants her permission to take my kids out of the country. She just has to provide that, along with the kids' birth certificates when she goes through customs in order to show that she's not trying to kidnap the kids and leave the country. I'm not worried about her skipping out and never coming back. If she did that she'd be walking away from the child support I pay, and there's no way she's going to do that.

Normally this would be something that could be handled with a single phone call where she calls me up, tells me she needs the note, I agree to to it and send it off. Done deal. Normal would be the key word there. The circumstances surrounding our divorce were nowhere near normal, and that is where the complications arise. She was impregnated by someone else shortly after the two of us separated, but he abandoned her and the baby while the baby was recovering from some complications he had and was in the newborn intensive care unit. I know, such a classy guy, but hey, he was more fun than me so what's a girl to do?

Our divorce had not been finalized at the time, in fact, the papers had not even been filed yet because I was still trying to convince her that I could get past everything that had happened and work things out. Looking back, I'm glad we didn't because it would have just prolonged the inevitable, and I'm much happier now, but hindsight's always 20/20, right? Anyway, since we were still married, Utah state law required that my name be put on the birth certificate even though she and I both insisted that the baby wasn't mine. The problem for me is that this would have required me to pay child support on him as well as my other two, which is not something I was willing to do. I told her I'd be his father figure, but shelling out another $250 or so a month was where I had to draw the line, so I took a paternity test. Once the state got those results back they started to go after the real biological father for child support.

Now that you have that background you can see how this little jaunt of hers to Mexico is more complicated than it's worth. She wants me to grant permission for her to take all three kids out of the country, but I'm not sure I can legally do that. She told me that her travel agent said that all they need is a signature from the person listed on the birth certificate, but I'm not going to sign off until I'm absolutely sure. It wouldn't be the first time I'd signed something on her behalf and had it come back and bite me in the ass.

I expressed my concerns to her in our last phone conversation.

Her: "Well, I'll double check. If you can't then maybe I'll just have to have my fiancee go down and see if he can get a signature from [biological father]."

Now, this highlights one of the things that used to drive me crazy about my ex-wife. She would never take care of things that had the potential to be awkward or uncomfortable for her. She always expected me to do it for her, and now apparently expects her fiancee to as well. I decided to say something to her about it.

Me: "Or, you could go down and talk to him yourself."
Her: "I know, but I've tried talking to him before. You have no idea what it's like to try and have a conversation with a child."
Me: "Oh, I know exactly what it's like to try and have a conversation with someone who acts like a child."
Her: "Shut up, you big dork."

Hey, I have to get my digs in when I can.