It sucks when you come to the realization that the best relationship you can expect to develop with a girl you're interested in is that of 'casual acquaintance.' Having said that, I guess it's better to realize that early on so there isn't a lot of wasted effort involved.
I was talking to a friend of mine the other day and he offered the following take on things:
"You just tend to be on the far end of a spectrum. You're a nice guy, but you're a non-threat. Girls recognize that so they open up to you because they know you're not going to try anything and that makes them feel safe. I think that you and I can both agree that you've had a string of girls that will talk to you a lot, but that's as far as it goes, and I think that's probably the reason why."
It's a good point, and it's probably the reason why people say that nice guys finish last. It's not that girls don't like nice guys, it's that nice guys aren't as likely to make a move on a girl because they're worried about offending the girl. Of course, most girls don't want to just sit and wait around, so they're going to end up with the guys who aren't afraid to say or do anything. I probably just need to work on being one of those guys.
Maybe I should take some advice from Faith No More:
Be aggressive
B-E aggressive
B-E A-G-G-R-E-S-S-I-V-E
4 comments:
Why would you want to change who you are for a girl? I think there needs to be a lot more nicer people in the world.
Maybe you're not hanging around the right kind of girls??? At least you're not taking advantage of the wrong kind though....
Not for a girl, Kris. For girls. Plural. The goal is to get lots of them.
I wonder which girl you're talking about now...
Also, nice guys don't always finish last. (Almost) Everyone knows I always go for those.
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