Q: When you make burritos how many do you eat? Are they big or small?
A: Two. Medium sized.
Q: What do you usually eat for breakfast?
A: Nothing.
Q: What do you usually eat for lunch?
A: I normally go out for lunch and order the veggie options on the menu (or at least low fat).
Anyway, I thought I'd help her out a little more than that by listing what I've had for dinner the past few days:
- Baby carrots and hummus + pancakes
- Scrambled egg beaters + a halibut fillet + chips and salsa
- Clam chowder + gourmet hot chocolate
- Chicken and broccoli linguine + oatmeal w/ brown sugar
You see, the key to the Native Minnow diet is to find things that absolutely do NOT go together and combine them into one meal. It will probably agree with your stomach more if you eat them at different times. For example, eat the carrots and hummus before you decide to fix yourself pancakes. Of course, the degree that the food is mismatched gets proportionally worse the longer one puts off a trip to the supermarket (I finally broke down and went shopping last night).
7 comments:
Alpha's Grocery List
1. Hummus
2. Baby Carrots
3. Ingredients for Pancakes
4. Pass on the Clam Chowder Ew
5. Egg Beaters
6. Chicken
7. Broccoli
8. Linguini
Thanks, Minnow!
and of course you always put them in the microwave for 1 minute 11 seconds right?
I remember when I came to see you in Vegas, I opened the fridge and wholah (I don't know how to spell wholah) and the only thing that was in there was tortillas, cheese and beans. I think there was a gallon of skim milk as well...and that WAS IT. :)
Voilà
(you're welcome)
One more thing, the good part about this diet is that once in a while you can just throw caution to the wind and eat whatever you want, no matter how bad it is for you.
For example, you can go to an Irish Pub on trivia night and order a plate of bangers and mash. Or as my friend A-Piz referred to it, a "plate of cock."
It is also true that if you have less food in teh house, you tend to eat less...that is why parents with kids living in the home tend to be fatter...(a scientific study proved this last week)...PI
I did and still do think belching and farting is taboo. It's not cute, it is disgusting. I realize it may be a part of life, but once it becomes, say belching the ABCs that is just wrong. I will never forget when my whole family thought this was funny and decided that as soon as I said, Please pass the milk everyone would belch. I went up to the table that night, every one in my family is staring me down, the milk is clear across the table. I was feeling very annoyed because they wouldn't stop staring, so instead of asking, I obeyed the one and only rule we ever had at the table, which was...keep one foot on the floor...and reached over and grabbed the milk myself.
They were oh so disappointed.
Post a Comment