The other day a group of us were playing basketball. When we finished one of my friends announced that he will be holding a 2 on 2 basketball tournament at his house in a few weeks. I knew about it already as I was with him when he bought the curbside basketball hoop, but some of our other friends hadn't been informed yet.
(In the earliest stages of planning, his roommate had offered to run the grill wearing a bikini. She followed that up by saying she didn't own one, but being the selfless guy that I am, I offered to buy her one if she needed me to.)
Friend 1: So are you guys interested in playing in the tournament?
Me: The only reason I'm coming over is to see [her]in a bikini.
Friend 2: Who's [she]?
Me: She's the little cutie that lives with [Friend 1].
Friend 2: She's a cutie huh?
Friend 1: That's what they say.
Me: Oh, don't act like you've never noticed.
. . .
Friend 2(to me): So what's the matter, is she too old and mature for you?
Me: I think she's 23.
Friend 2: So yeah, she's way too old and mature for you.
. . .
Friend 2 (to Friend 1): So do you two just sit around speaking German to each other?
Me: They do!
Friend 1: Actually, we talk about the people that are sitting right next to us without them even knowing it's them we're talking about.
Friend 2: Really?
Me: Yeah, it's usually stuff like "I wish [Minnow] would put his penis back in his pants."
8 comments:
That sounds like a great roommate.
I always wish I could speak another language so I could talk about people. I think Swahili would be best though since Spanish isn't exactly foreign around here...
I hate it when people talk behind my back like that...
I overheard this once "Er ist wie eine Zuchtspringmaus gehÃĪngt"
I told them that I was indeed NOT hung like a stud gerbil.
I am not even sure if that's the exact translation, but that's what I got out of it.
I, too, would like to speak in another language with someone about everyone else -- although I tend to just say those snide remarks right out loud, instead.
If she follows through, make sure to get a nice picture to post. :) PI
PI, you are so shallow!!
And, out of curiosity, this isn't your ex-girlfriend, is it?
Nice of you to offer to buy her a swimsuit. You are the nice brother. :)
No, it's not my ex-girlfriend.
Hmmmmm....... sounds like fun, anyway.... go for a thong, unless she had a big butt.
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