I noticed for the first time that these have a 12 cylinder engine. I wondered aloud what the gas mileage was like for a 12 cylinder, and my friend and I agreed that it couldn't get many miles to the gallon. My friend pointed out that it probably did, however, get a lot of Poon Per Gallon (PPG).
I concur.
So, for those of you who are considering a new vehicle purchase, and PPG is high on your list of priorities, I give you Native Minnow's Guide To Shopping For A New Vehicle*.
Vehicles with a very high PPG rating:
Bugatti Veyron
Ferrari F430 Scuderia
Lamborghini Gallardo
Ducati Superbike
Vehicles with a very low PPG rating:
1970's Disco Van
White Trash Stretch Limo
Redneck Hearse
Honda Trail 90
You're welcome. Happy shopping!
*All images have been shamelessly lifted from the interweb with no credit given for the source. They are not pictures I took in my garage.
16 comments:
Poon per gallon is a sweet concept. But I bet might be underestimating the 70s disco van. But then again, perhaps the question is what kind of poon we're talking about.
Exactly.
I'm thinking you might be able to get the CSI girl with a few of them.
I have never been even moderately impressed by cars. However, I have been repulsed by them. Those white trash mobiles are hideous.
Exactly...you could get a lot of WTPPG (White Trash Poon Per Gallon) with most of those cars...
If I see a guy in a giant truck or a car worth more than 20k I assume that he must have an incredibly small penis.
I drive a Prius. When you drive a prius people flip you off because they are so jealous that you get 45 MPGs.
oops. no this one is me, lol.
I don't know if I agree with your algorithm. My boyfriend has rusty green mini-van and I put out almost immediately.
Spot-on & hilarious. I've considered the same thing, although your naming system is better. The Bugatti & Gallardo are flat-out spectacular.
oh i want that first one!!!
bwahahahahahahah.
I don't agree that the Ducati has high PPG. It does, however, probably have high CPG (cornhole per gallon) because bullet bikes are gay.
I agree with silentkid. The Ducati can't pull in the poon I want.
i think it would have the opposite effect on me. i meet someone with a high ppg car i will immediately question their intelligence in spending so much money on transportation and not waste my time on them. but then again, cars have never been a factor for me in who i choose to spend time with :)
the white trash stretch limo is priceless!! too funny...
Grrrherhahahahaha! But, the cylinders on a 12-banger are nearly always shorter and narrower than those for 8, 6, 4 cylinder models. My Jag XJ-12 is only 327 Cubic Inches. Smaller than most V8s and some V-6s.
MPG is pretty good. PPG... I'd rather not discuss.
I love the White Trash Stretch Limo. Ha ha ha!!!! Personally, I would swoon over a beautifully restored, 2-tone VW bus. ahhhh...
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