Monday, May 04, 2009

Tailored suits, chauffered cars, fine hotels, and big cigars, up for grabs, up for a price

Friend: So what's the deal with you and that Asian girl?

Me: What are you talking about?

Friend: I've seen the flirting. It seems to be going both ways.

Me: Nah. I don't make enough money to keep that girl happy.

Friend: Do you think she's a gold digger?

Me: I guarantee it.

Friend: How do you know that?

Me: She works as an image consultant.

Friend: I don't even know what that is.

Me: I didn't either, until I asked her. It's basically someone who helps rich people pick out expensive gifts for their wives or girlfriends.

Friend: So like a personal shopper?

Me: I guess. But expensive stuff. She told me she helps guys pick out diamond necklaces, or $4000 evening gowns. Stuff like that.

Friend: That's crazy.

Me: I told her that if there were men willing to spend that much on their women, that surely there would be women out there who are willing to spend that kind of money on their men, and that I needed to find one of those women.

Friend: What did she say to that?

Me: She said, "You're going to need to clean it up." I asked, "Clean what up?" She said, "All of it!"

Friend: You're right. You can't afford her.

Me: I told you!

8 comments:

PsychDoctor said...

HA Ha Ha!!!!! same here...

Anonymous said...

Nothing wrong with dreaming big Minnow. One question though....just how old are you prepared to go? :)

Heff said...

"She not love you longtime..."

2 Dollar Productions said...

You're probably right, but that's in the long term. In the short term, clean yourself up & make a surgical strike. Ha. Her comment about 'all of it' was great.

Amber said...

I want her job!!

silentkid said...

Asian Chick is lame. Doesn't matter if she's hot. She's lame like Twitter.

Jenny said...

bwaahahah to Heff.

you can do better.

h said...

Heff stole my line! But I recognized the lyrics again.