Today one of my friends called to tell me that she was breaking up with her boyfriend. It'd been a while since we last talked, so after she'd told me all about it, she asked me about any updates regarding Girl Who Won't Be My Girlfriend.
Me: I took her out to dinner last weekend, and we had a really good talk. She's called me every day since then, and she wants to do something tomorrow night. She's also asked me to have lunch with her tomorrow and the day after. Of course I said yes to all of those things, but I'm not sure I should have.
Her: Oh stop it. Just go out tomorrow night and have fun with her. Do you want my advice?
Me: Sure.
Her: I think you should invite her to spend the night at your place, wait until she falls asleep, and then rape her.
I think it's time to stop taking advice from my friends.
9 comments:
and you wonder why you never get a second date.
How is it that there is such a giant cluster of serial killer types in your area? Better yet- how is it that they are all your friends?
Just bang her head on the wall again and call it good.
there you go, you could always impregnate her, then she'd HAVE to be your girlfriend hehehehehehe ;>
I want to be best friend with your friend.
Also: more unsolicited advice? You are BLOWING it if you actually go to all of those things with her. I feel like you need to go rent "Just Friends."
Is it really rape if they offer to spend the night ?
I can see now why I was single for so long. If I just could have had this advice a little earlier in life...
lol nice...but seriously you can't be too available...or she'll walk all over you!
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
I would have given you the same advice.
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