The Bright Side

I was thinking about some of the benefits of not being the custodial parent when Christmas comes around. See the list below (in no particular order):

• I don't have to worry about getting a Christmas tree and setting it up so that it's straight (nearly impossible to do without magic powers).
• It looks more impressive to the kids when I pull up and start unloading all the presents from the trunk of my car than it does if I'm living there and only bringing them in the house a few at a time.
• I don't have to worry about where to hide the presents from Santa so the kids don't find them before Christmas.
• No worrying about what old toys the kids need to get rid of to clear out space for the new ones.
• I don't always have to get on the kids about trying to peek at their presents if I'm not there to see them do it.
• I can take the kids to their grandparents' house for a week, and drop them off at home just in time for them to start whining and fighting with each other.
• I can buy annoying toys, yet still not be annoyed by them.