Tuesday, September 04, 2007

It makes no difference to me what you leave behind

Today I was approached by a man who wanted to wash the windows on my car for a dollar. I told him no. Then, he asked if he could have a dollar so that he could buy some water. I just kept walking because I'm a bastard and have no regard for humanity. When I got to my car, my friend and I got into a conversation about other ways the guy could get water for free. My suggestion was that he go to a public building and use the water fountain. My friend said that if he wasn't too proud to approach people and ask them for money, then he shouldn't be too proud to try and fill up a cup from a sprinklerhead or something.

I know I drank from a garden hose as a kid, and I'm sure almost everyone has, but as my friend and I were talking about it I had to concede that it might not be the smartest thing to do in case the water wasn't treated and you ended up catching something.

Friend: There aren't a lot of cattle where I come from, so we didn't have to worry about getting Giardia.
Me: It doesn't have to be cattle. I think it can be any mammal. I think beavers are the worst.
Friend: Yeah, well we didn't have a lot of beavers either.
Me: Fine, maybe you could have gotten it from armadillos. You can't guarantee that no armadillo got into your well.
Friend: In that case, I would have caught leprosy.
Me: Really? You can get leprosy just from touching an armadillo?
Friend: I don't think you can get it just from touching them. I'm not sure exactly how it's transferred.
Me: My guess is sexually. So, you probably don't want to have sex with an armadillo.
Friend: Thanks. I'll try to keep that in mind.

6 comments:

Anonymous said...

I would have let him wash my windshield for $1...I would have given him even more for a complete car wash...
But, I agree...I need $1 for a bottle of water? Water is free everywhere, $1 for a diet coke would make more sense...

steph said...

i always drank from my hose....and swallowed pool water, and even drank from the stream in our woods. then when i moved to nyc, i just drank straight from the tap.

maybe there's a reason i am allergic to everything now.

Othersideblue said...

hi
i am here through blog surfing and I dont wonder that u didn't like his attitude, times like this naturally one appreciates the truth more than false stories.

mindy said...

actually, you can get leprosy just from touching an armadillo. I think they are the only other mammal that gets/carries the disease.

Surprised you didn't know that. said in my best Chris Farley voice.

Anonymous said...

I never give people money for that either...especially when they are so intrusive to start washing your window without your permission so you feel guilty and give them money. That is when I just say thank you and get in my car and drive away... :)

PsychoIntern

Anonymous said...

I always drank from the hose as a kid, and look how I turned out! Hose water tastes good!
AP