Over Thanksgiving weekend, Togers decided he wanted to try jumping into the pool. You know, because he just couldn't wait to see what forty degree water felt like. He didn't stay in the water long, and when he was done he placed his wet shorts on the fence in the back yard to dry. A few hours later my ex looked out and saw them there.
Ex: [Togers], go get those wet shorts off the fence before someone comes along and steals them.
Togers: Why would someone steal boys' shorts?
Ex: They might. People steal women's underwear all the time.
Togers: Yeah, but that's women's underwear. That's a little different.
Me: Not necessarily. You don't think there are any pedophiles around? They might be interested in stealing your shorts.
Ex: Yeah, [Togers]. You've always been a pedophile's favorite.