Wednesday, March 03, 2010

She's got hands like a man's with hair on the back

I lost my Swiss Army key-chain knife a few weeks ago. To most of you this wouldn't be a big deal, but you see, it's how I trim my nails. Finger and toe. I also have crooked toes. Crooked toes and long toe nails are not a good combination for me because that's when a few of my toenails try to become ingrown. So last night I got a pedicure in an attempt to curb the ingrowingness of some of my toenails.

While getting my toes worked on, a tall women with enormous breasts walked in to get her nails done. Or so I thought. When "she" opened her mouth to tell the nail person what "she" wanted, it was a voice that was way too low to be a woman's. At that point I felt a little dirty for admiring "her" breasts. But who am I to judge? After all, I was in a nail salon getting a pedicure.

When I went up to the front counter to pay, the tranny looked at me and asked, "So what color did you get?"

"No color."

"You didn't opt for glittery nails? Or maybe something army green?"


"Did you like it?"

"I did."

"Isn't she amazing?"

"She is*. I'll probably have to come back on a more regular basis."

"I like a man who takes care of his feet."

"Not many do. Have a nice day."

Once again, I didn't get a number.

*The lady who gave me the pedicure was hot too - I couldn't help but think naughty things while she was massaging my feet.


BSH ADMIN said...


Heff said...


Kymical Reactions said...

dude. (shakes head in shame)

vivalacrap said...

Next time get a bikini wax. That will counteract the gayness of the pedicure.

Amber said...

LOL what would we do without our swiss army knives? i use the tweezers out of mine the most, they are the best tweezers in the world :)

steph said...

oh my god. amazing.

this would have been an awesome exchange to see.