Thursday, April 03, 2008

Wash your hands of it forever

Girl 1: Can I have some gum?

Me: That was my last piece. But do you want this one that I'm chewing? You can have it.

Girl 1: Ok.

Girl 2: Gross.

Girl 1: Why is that gross? Because [Minnow] has diseases?

Girl 2: Yeah.

Me: You don't even know me. You can't say that.

Girl 2: I've heard enough.

Me: Don't believe everything you hear.

Girl 1: The only thing you need to know about [Minnow] is that he's from Utah, so he has 15 wives.

Girl 2: So he does have diseases then.

Me: No diseases. They were all virgins when I married them, because they were all like twelve years old. Isn't that the way polygamy works?

Girl 1: You should know. You're the polygamist.

Me: Besides, fifteen wives? That's way too many. Actually, do you know how many wives is too many?

Girl 1: How many?

Me: One.

6 comments:

Native Minnow said...

Like you didn't see that one coming.

savannah said...

nope, didn't have a clue, sugar ;-)

steph said...

gross maybe, but i always share gum.

and that is a pretty hilarious ending to the conversation, though yes, i did see it coming!

2 Dollar Productions said...

One is questionable, and anymore than that and you're asking for more trouble than any one human can handle.

As for the gum, I think I would wait and buy a pack.

adventures of a mad scientist said...

I just wouldn't accept an already chewed piece of gum because it's lost its flavor.

silentkid said...

I've got some old gum for you, minnow.