Thursday, December 04, 2008

You say, I like what you say, I like what you say

I'm taking a page out of the Book of Troll for today's post. I need to poll you guys in order to see what the general consensus is on three very important questions.

1) What is the proper etiquette when you're sitting in a public restroom stall, taking a dump, and someone else walks in?
a) It makes no difference. You go ahead and finish, wipe, and leave the stall to wash your hands.
b) You pause, and wait for them to leave the restroom before dropping the rest of the kids off at the pool.
c) You make as much noise as possible, grunting and farting loudly, in an attempt to scare them off.
d) You finish, and wipe, but wait until they leave before exiting the stall.
e) It depends on how far along you are in the dumpage when they walk in.

2) Is it possible to be Jewish and a Quaker?
a) Yes
b) No
c) It depends

3) Let's say that hypothetically you'd let your laundry pile up long enough that you had no more clean underwear. Do you
a) put off going about your day until you've done some laundry?
b) put on a pair of dirty underwear and go about your day?
c) go commando long enough to run to the store and buy some more underwear?
d) go commando for the entire day, but make sure to do laundry when you get home?
e) go commando for the rest of your life, because who wears underwear anyway?

Your input is greatly appreciated.


silentkid said...

b, b, b.

Amber said...

it really does depend on the situation, sometimes i choose a third option which is to flush the toilet, cough, or blow my nose to cover up the sound of the kids being dropped off

c and c or d

kaleb just buys new clothes instead of doing his laundry LOL that's what his dad would do when he was growing up men are so sad sometimes lol

TROLL said...

1) B with an E modifier in some extreme cases.

2) C. Depends on the context. Certainly (most) Jews can participate in a Quaker "Meeting for Learning" event and still be considered Jews (by most).

3) I forgot the letter but I go commando most-of-the-time whether I have clean undies available or not.

Anonymous said...

b, b, and d

Boxer said...

I take the fifth.

Heff said...

3.- a variation of b.

Flip dirty underwear inside out, and wear as clean.

Anonymous said...

Question 1.

I never take a dump in a public restroom in the interests of public safety. On the odd occasion when it has become necessary I drop the kids off and immediately flush to minimise the collateral damage. Hope that helps. Slot it in where you think it most appropriate.

Question 2.

No idea.

Question 3.

Finally one I can answer. D. I'd rather wear nothing than dirty knickers.

2 Dollar Productions said...

E, B & D. Number 1 was tough . . .

Native Minnow said...

Ok, here's my take.

Question 1: The answer is E. It depends on how far along you are. If you're basically done, you don't want to sit there for a while. Besides, they know you're in there, so they have to opportunity to turn around and go out. If you're just getting started, then you should hold it in (if possible) and wait until they leave before filling the air with your stink. Of course, the option that I didn't list, never take a dump in a public restroom, should really be your first choice.

Question 2: I thought B. But then a girl claimed to be both, and after arguing with her, I realized that I just didn't understand what it means to be a Quaker. I still haven't researched it, because I'm lazy, but it might be possible.

Question 3: I'd say either B or D depending. B as long as the dirty ones don't stink. D if they do.

Thanks for playing.

Dee Ice Hole said...

A; B; C See I learned the ABC's when I was just a lad---they always help out.

Epitome of Sweetness said...

You also forgot the option of wearing swim trunks or bikini bottoms.

1. D (If necessary and you can't go home)
2. A
3. A

BSH ADMIN said...

1)E. If I'm almost done, I'll try to finish up and get out of there before they can leave their stall. If I've just started, I'll usually try to wait until they leave, BUT this has backfired before when the other person is also waiting for me to leave so they can poop. Poop Chicken.


3)B. I'll do a sniff test through the dirty ones and find the least used pair. But this rarely, if ever, happens to me because I have such an enormous stockpile of underwear.

steph said...

1. a
2. a
3. e

Though I have to admit, I am not so sure on the Quaker and Jewish thing. I think yes, because all of the Quaker friend schools are all about the peace and consensus and all that, so sure.

verity said...

for 1, what about the option of flushing as soon as you've dropped? That way you prevent the smelliness of it all and subsequent potential embarrassment

for 2, I can't even answer though I would think a, because being Jewish is not just a relgion but a race, right? So you can be a non-practicing Jew who practices Quakerism?

3. I've done b, not ashamed to admit it.

i don't use socks said...

Are all the dirty underwears sploogefree?

i don't use socks said...

Are all the dirty underwears sploogefree?

Anonymous said...

2. A.

You fail.