Last night there was a bachelorette party at the table next to us at the bar. They were playing some sort of dice game where they needed to do certain things with certain types of people. A half hour or so after they started I heard someone call out to me.
"Are you tall?"
"Yeah, I'm tall."
"Good. Can you come here for a second?"
Then the bachelorette grabbed my hand and started singing to me: "I don't want anybody else, when I think about you I touch myself*."
Apparently the dice told her she needed to sing to a tall guy. I was happy to offer my services.
About an hour later, she walked back over to the table.
"I need a tall guy again. You're my trusty tall guy. You're the one I can sing to. Can you help me again?"
"Sure, no problem."
"Now I'm supposed to do a shot with a tall guy. Will you do a shot with me?"
"What do you want?"
"I don't know. Just get whatever you want. I don't drink."
"You don't drink? What do you mean you don't drink?"
"I mean I don't drink. I've only done a shot once. Twice if you count sake. This will be the third shot I've ever taken in my life."
"We're going to do a Jager Bomb."
So I did a Jager bomb** with her. Who am I do deny a dying*** woman her last wish?
My friend is convinced that I could've made out with her last night. Looking at some pictures that another friend texted me of the event, I think he might be right. She was hanging on me for a little while afterward, posing for pictures and whatnot. I didn't make out with her though. I only gave her a kiss on the cheek.
I'm classy, yo.
**It was terrible - don't worry, I'm not going to start drinking.
***Dying, getting married, same diff.