Yesterday I was talking with one of the graduate students (who happens to be female) as we walked into the departmental office. I don't remember what led up to this exchange, so you have to start kind of in the middle. It's okay. I'm sure the 'introductory' conversation was boring anyway.
Me: It's because you're such a smart girl. Wait, I should say woman instead of girl, huh?
Female Grad Student: You should.
Me: I know. I use the word 'girl' all the time, because I never think about it not being politically correct. I always seem to forget that bitches don't like to be called girls.
Female Professor (laughing): I can't believe you just said that. I could bring a sexual harassment suit against you.
Me: No you couldn't. I don't work here anymore.
Female Professor: Good point.
Me: You could, however, call the cops and have me arrested for trespassing*.
* I still have a key. I'm pretty sure I could beat the rap.