Friday, December 01, 2006

Smaller and smaller and smaller*

The other day I walked into the office and one of the secretaries commented about how skinny I am. It's actually a little bit funny when people say things like that to me, because while I am thin, I have been gaining weight lately.

I told her that, if anything, I need to start trying to work off the gut that's starting to form (I have a six pack that's just dying to peek out, I promise).

Her: No. You need to find yourself a nice Latin woman to fatten you up.
Me: I don't need any woman. I'm doing just fine the way things are. I don't really want to put any effort into anything right now.
Her: Well, in that case, maybe we should start a list where people can sign up to be your girlfriend.
Me: And are you going to manage it for me?
Her: Sure.
Me: Actually, to be honest with you, that's probably a list I'd be afraid to see.



*I'm leaving early in the morning for a wedding in Massachussetts. I may not have internet access, or much time for posting, so I'm leaving an extra post for you today. Pace yourselves, you've got to make it last.

3 comments:

Native Minnow said...

and before you start thinking I'm schizophrenic, there are a few girls that I would be interested in dating right now. First and foremost the one I've talked about having a crush on, but when other people talk to me about wanting to find a woman for me I'd rather not deal with it. I'll find one on my own or not at all thank you very much.

Anonymous said...

I know. First everyone wants everyone else married, then they want them to have a bunch of kids. It's comical.

Anonymous said...

you should have one of those applications to be my girlfriend ask questions like "what is your credit score?" and "How many Jager shots does it take for you to blow me?" ha ha ah ah. rock.