Friday, March 14, 2008

No more floozies only high class hoes

Reasons why I'm thinking of becoming a high end prostitute:

- There's a lot of money involved.
- I need money.
- I can be discrete when necessary.
- It is prestigious to have sex with celebrities.
- Rich guys would buy me stuff (e.g., jewelry, nice hotels, fancy dinners, etc.).


Reasons why it probably wouldn't work out:

- I'm not female.
- I'm not hot.
- I don't have a "purdy" mouth.
- My butthole doesn't fit all sizes.
- I wouldn't swallow.
- STDs.

11 comments:

Manuel said...

be a waiter then.....it's much the same without the bum sex

Jenny said...

A boy can dream, however....

steph said...

if your butthole doesn't fit all sizes, does it fit some sizes?

and that is your inappropriate comment for the day!

Anonymous said...

"My butthole doesn't fit all sizes."

Give it time.

Anonymous said...

I'd fuck you.











For money! :)

Michelle said...

oh, just eww

PsychDoctor said...

Did you see Conan O'Brien's take on the sex scandal?

It purported to be a Republican ad attacking Spitzer for his lack of morals...it goes on and on, then shows a picture of the prostitute...it goes on for a second, then the person doing the ad goes back to the picture and starts saying things like, "He tapped that for $5000? That would be a bargain for half the price. We salute you Governor Spitzer...etc..." it was hilarious...I visited her myspace page the other day...She is an aspiring singer and has had something like 7 million hits to her page since this story came out.

2 Dollar Productions said...

Discretion counts for a lot, I imagine. And were you quoting Kid Rock on the title? Ha.

Amber said...

the butthole one will haunt me all day - shudders - i really didn't need that visualization lol

Native Minnow said...

Manuel, is that why you do it?

Boxer, indeed I can.

Steph, not that I'm aware of.

Anonymous, I don't wanna.

Waitress, how much? Ha!

Michelle, I know. I would say I'm sorry, but I'm not.

Dr. Psycho, I didn't. I wonder if it's on YouTube.

$2, I imagine so too, and yes I was. That Kid Rock album is one of my guilty pleasures.

Amber, again, I would say sorry, but I'm not ;-)

Bill From Gainesville said...

Like anything in life you have to weigh out the pro's and con's and you have really gotten to the heart of the matter. I salute you minnow....