Mr M came home from school last week and said he was feeling sick.
My ex-wife asked him if he thought it might be because he wasn't drinking enough water.
He told her that it wasn't that. It was because if he couldn't think about guns he has a nervous breakdown, and he can't think about guns when he's at school.
In related news, my parenting goals just changed: If I can get my kids raised without one of them being involved in a school shooting, I'll feel like a success.