I used to do a little but a little wouldn't do and so a little got more and more

Without going into all the details about the situation, someone in my family recently got in trouble for using drugs. My mom told me about a conversation she had with my grandma about it, and I relayed that to one of my friends because I thought it was funny.

Me: My Grandma asked my mom what the signs of meth use were, so my mom told her. My grandma said, "Oh, my teeth are rotting and my house is a mess and I have sores all over me....what if someone thinks I am on meth?" She was serious. My mom said, "I don't think you have to worry about it." (My grandma is a little 91 year old lady.)

Friend: Or maybe she's on meth...

Me: I doubt she'd have lived this long if that were the case

Friend: Dammit grandma, put down the pipe!!


Maybe it's time for an intervention.

Snortin' blue collared gak from a black hooker's ass, the mirror ball's startin' to rock

A friend of mine stated that he was "hoovering some Bolivian marching powder" the other day, prompting the following email exchange about the economy.


----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: [Native Minnow]
Date: Jan 29, 2008 12:57 AM


What exactly is Bolivian marching powder?

And what does hoovering mean?

I'm dumb

----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: [Rural Murder]
Date: Jan 29, 2008 8:08 AM


hoovering = sucking up like a Hoover vacuum = snorting
Bolivian Marching Powder = C-C-C-C-C-Cocaine

----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: [Native Minnow]
Date: Jan 29, 2008 11:00 AM


Well, that's what I thought, but I wasn't exactly sure. Put down the mirror, the razor blade and the rolled up $100 bill. That's only going to result in a dead hooker. And no-one wants that. Especially the hooker.

----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: [Rural Murder]
Date: Jan 29, 2008 2:47 PM


I was actually snorting it out of the ass crack of a dead hooker. And you can't use US currency anymore, only euros.

We'll be safe from Satan when the thunder rolls

You know you're addicted to The Wire when . . .

. . . you keep talking to your friends about The Wire, even though none of them have ever seen a single episode.

. . . you dream about having lunch with Stringer Bell.


. . . you freak out when HBO On Demand is missing the next two episodes that you need to watch.

. . . you drive to every video store you can think of so you can rent the disc with the missing episodes.

. . . you go home after not finding the disc at any video store and call the cable company inquiring as to why the episodes are missing.

. . . you tell the cable company that you're going to keep calling them until the problem is fixed.

. . . you dream that you're running for Mayor of Baltimore.


The Wire: More addictive than crack.